


And It's A Long Way Forward (So Trust In Me)

by Nactmerrie



Series: i got your back if you got mine (all that we have is each other) [1]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Crying, F/M, Mentions of other characters - Freeform, and that need is GHOST, bless you nolanbot for i did not know true love until i heard ghost, ghost deserves gentle smooches and hugs, i don't know about you guys but i cry when i see ghost, i have a need, mentions of possible death - Freeform, no beta we die like men, spoilers for destiny 2 my dudes, this is way self indulgent my dudes, use of 2nd person in case yall aint into that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-10
Updated: 2017-12-10
Packaged: 2019-02-12 22:00:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12969294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nactmerrie/pseuds/Nactmerrie
Summary: Ghost thinks about his Guardian and what she means to him, what he means to her, and how in the end he wants to be selfish for once.His Guardian wants him to be selfish.





	And It's A Long Way Forward (So Trust In Me)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pagan_mint](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pagan_mint/gifts).



> To Pagan_Mint, who ruined me by introducing me to Destiny in the first place. She did not know what she would bring about. 
> 
> The title of the fic is from Shelter by Porter Robinson and Madeon.

You wonder if The Guardian knows you’d die if they did.

Especially now that The Guardian, Your Guardian, Yours is curled around you protectively even while sleeping. It’s similar to when she protected you from Ghaul, more concerned about an insignificant droid than her own life.

You move closer to her, quietly, carefully, until you’re nuzzled against her cheek. Warm in her rebirth and the flames coursing through her veins. You hope she doesn’t mind when she wakes up, even though instinctively you know she won’t be.

It’s nice against her like this, where you can feel her breath against you and her hair would be tickling you if you could feel that. You like to imagine it though.

She lost her light and you called for her and called for her and called for her until she found you limping and lightless. You couldn’t feel her and felt what you imagine could be close to heartbreak. You didn’t know if she was alive until you saw her and felt her pick you up as though you were the most fragile and important thing in the whole universe.

You never knew love before her, you could admit that much to yourself, but maybe you always loved her. Predetermined by your search for her, solidified by her quiet presence, and confirmed when you nuzzle closer to her warmth.

You’re just a Ghost, one of many, but with her, sometimes you feel like you’re much more than that.

She treats you with such gentleness, not that other Guardians don’t do the same to their Ghosts, but you can’t help but feel special. Especially when she presses her face to your casing, her nose rubbing against you in an affectionate manner.

Her breathing changes, more alive and she pulls back to look at you, her eyes saying that you need rest, and you know it.  

You know that she’s worried about you, more so than recently after everything, more so every time you have to interact with Failsafe.

Failsafe hits too close to home of what you could be, of what you will be, and it scares you. Always wondering what you could have done more to protect Her.

“Alright, though, I can’t actually sleep!” You start to ramble, flustered in your own way, and you hear her chuckle, feel it really. She re-curled her body so her knees bring you closer to her face.

Her lips tremble against you.

_I’m here, nothings going to happen to either of us._

She knows your fears, so quickly, and it almost hurts to know that you’ve become so predictable.

Or maybe it shows the connection the two of you share.

You pray to the Traveler that it’s that.

“G-guardian.”

She hums, a strange broken sound, that doesn’t quite work the way it should. It’s not sad, it just doesn’t form the words correctly, but you still love her.

“If you were to… If something were to happen to you. I want you to know that I wouldn’t leave you.” You don’t want to say die, it scares you.

You had searched too long for her, scoured planet after planet for the person you were destined for, and you weren’t going to lose her. Not even with the knowledge that you could find another Guardian, there is no other Guardian for you.

It’s only her.

“I would stay with you.”

She pulls away again, this time a different look on her face, confused and hurting.

She wants you to keep living.

“I want to stay with you, if that’s alright.”

You don’t have the right or the right words to voice it properly. It’s not fair to her.

It’s too selfish.  

She exhales in a way that her chest rises with a stutter.

You look up, afraid, and so, so, so in love with your Guardian. It’s almost painful how much you want to say it, but can’t. Because this is wrong, you shouldn’t love her, you should be here to serve her and make sure her light shines as bright as her smile.

You didn’t want to become another Failsafe, desperate for scraps of that smile.

She’s smiling so sadly, her hand moving you closer to her again, to her chest so you could feel her heartbeat. You can feel it, renewed with every breath that she takes.

You wish you could do that same for her, that you could envelope her in your warmth and protect her from Ghaul, from the Vex, from everything.  

She’s curled so tightly around you, that you almost swear no one could ever hurt you, and you’re bursting at your seams to tell her.

Just tell her.

Why can’t you just tell her?

You should be able to tell her everything.

“Guardian.”

She hums again, a different sound, broken and nearly hiccupping on it.

She’s crying.

For you?

For you.

It’s easy to tell, when her fingers gently touch you, stroking at scratch marks from bullets and knives. Trying to will non-existent wounds away from your non-existent body. It’s all she can do in this moment.

She loves you too, why else would she be crying and begging in her own way for you to live. To live if she were… If she were to leave you.

She’s shielded you from enemies when it’s your job to protect her.

Almost died making sure Ghaul wouldn’t touch you.

She lost her light for you.

“Oh, Traveler forgive me, I love you Guardian.” You can afford selfishness, you only have one life, and you’re choosing to share it with her.

Her fingers twitch against your case and she presses her lips where the tips of her nails meet the metal of your body.

She loves you.

And you love, love, love her.

Enough that you would lay down and stay with her forever.

Instead, she pulls you up with her, carrying you across the farm, past lightless individuals, past Cayde-6, past Ikora, past Zavala, until she can rest you in her lap on the roof of the farmhouse.

Together.

**Author's Note:**

> Haha Ghost is my true love and I'm crying. 
> 
> Also, this is my first fic with no sex, who's proud of me? I'm proud of me.


End file.
